The value of true friendship

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12  (NLT)

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. 

There is no better passage in all of Scripture that describes friendship and/or companionship.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said that the only way to have a friend is to be one.  Aristotle said that a friend is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.  Robert Louis Stevenson said that no one is useless while he has a friend.  King Solomon wrote that there are at least four reasons and advantages for having a companion, a partner, a very close friend:

1.   Good return for their labor, help each other succeed

2.   If one falls, the other is there to lift him up.

3.   Keep one another warm

4.   Help one another to resist attacks.

Everyone needs a friend to help you overcome attacks of temptation.  The Hebrew word used for “attack” actually means “more powerful” or to “prevail over” so it’s an attack that will defeat you unless you have someone in your life with whom the two of you can stand together and prevail over or against the attacker. The attacker can be an actual person, a physical foe, but also can be any temptation in your life that the enemy (flesh-world-devil) knows that you are weakest against.  You need someone with whom and to whom you can be accountable and will be there to help you to resist these attacks. 

Who in your life fits these descriptions?  If you are married, then your spouse is (or should be) meeting these needs.  However, for most of us, we also need a close friend of the same sex besides our spouse.  Women tend to have closer relationships with other women than men have with other men.  Sure, men have friends, but are they the type of friendships where you can easily share your innermost thoughts and needs, especially in the area of weakness(es)? 

Scripture above states that “three are even better” to overcome attacks.  Who is the third person?  Sure, it can be another friend or a friend plus your spouse, but this also refers to the active presence of the Lord and His full armor (read Ephesians 6:10-18) who enables you “to stand firm against the schemes of the devil”.

Baltasar Gracian, Jesuit priest and author in the 1600s said that “friendship multiples the good of life and divides the evil”.  The Roman philosopher, Cicero, said that “friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief”.   Who fits this model of friendship/ companionship in your life?  Why not forward this message to your closest friend(s) so that they know how you really feel about them.  What an encouraging affirmation of your friendship that will only grow stronger and help you even more to face and overcome all sources of temptation and trouble for the rest of your life.