Hope deferred; dream fulfilled

Proverbs 13:12 (NLT)

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.

This verse reminds me of a situation in my life many years ago.  One of my sons was a high school senior and on the wrestling team.  His goal was to wrestle well enough to make it to the state finals.  He knew that he was not good enough to win the state title, but thought that he had a good chance at least to be one of 16 finalists in his weight class.  He dedicated his senior year toward this goal and his whole family was praying that he would be successful in achieving this goal.  The big moment came when he was in a final semi-state match with the winner going to state.  However, he lost.  His dream was gone, he failed to reach his goal.

During that time, I came across this verse and realized how accurate it was.  My hopes for seeing my son make it to the state wrestling finals and also enabling him to see that dedicated hard work would pay off, were dashed.  Oh, indeed, I felt sick emotionally for many days and, in fact, years later, I still ache, as does my son, over this major disappointment.  I am certain that all who are reading this have had a similar experience, perhaps many. 

Life’s disappointments can be devastating.  It is your reaction to the disappointment that dictates how your life will proceed.  You can sulk, feel sorry for yourself, stay in bed, complain and remain emotionally sick for however long you choose.  Yet, what good do these reactions produce?  They don’t change the disappointment and they really don’t make you feel any better.  It is acceptable to be down in the dumps for a while, but eventually you have to recover and move on. 

The opposite of a hope deferred is a dream fulfilled.  Had my son made it to the state finals, his dream (and mine) would have been fulfilled and it would have been a “tree of life” for us.  What does “tree of life” mean?  In Psalm 1:1 it symbolizes prosperity and fruitfulness.  In Prov 3:18 it is wisdom that provides happiness.  The tree of life invigorates and encourages you.  That’s what happens when dreams are fulfilled.

What an interesting proverb this is because everyone reading this has experienced both hopes deferred and dreams fulfilled.  How opposite are the emotional responses to each.  However, note that this passage does not say that hope is gone, but rather uses the verb “deferred”.  Defer means to delay.  The object of your hope is delayed but the hope remains.  My son and I wanted to see him experience success in wrestling, verified by him making it to state.  He did not make it, yet later in his life, he has been very successful in other pursuits.    

What do you learn about hope from this proverb?  The Christian will always have hope; it is the wicked who have no hope (Eph 2:12, I Thess 4:13).  Hope deferred might even be referring to eternal life where all dreams are fulfilled rather than so many of our hopes that cannot be fulfilled in this fallen, temporal world.  Hope comes from the encouragement of the Scriptures (Rom 15:4) and will never disappoint the one who depends on the Lord (Rom 5:4-5).

May you always have hope and even when your hope is deferred, may you realize that someday your dreams, whatever they are, will come true in heaven, home of the tree of life (Rev 22:2).